The mix (II)

Major scientific results: I discovered that you can re-use the Starbucks paper cups for 5 days only, after that the tea that you poor in will slowly form a puddle under your cup.

To really optimize your shopping experience one of the strategies to follow is to go with a partner-in-crime, get one of those telephones that you can put in your ear and spread out. Then over the phone you can discuss what you found and ask the other person to be on the lookout for accessories that go with it.

Most of the local traffic rules I learned on the road. I already knew that a stop sign here means really stop and that you never ever want to pass a school bus with a ‘stop’ sign to the side. It took only about two or three slightly agitated people in the car behind me to blow their horn for me to realize that when the traffic light is red, you yield going to the right. Going left, you can go on a green light if the light is an arrow, if you share the light with traffic going straight ahead, you have to yield to oncoming traffic. It’s all easy enough. I also deduced that driving while talking on the phone is legal (if not, they could finance a war on the fines that they could get on that). On vehicle integrity I learned that unless your vender is actually touching the asphalt it can hang wherever it is hanging, in case it is about to touch the asphalt, fixing it with duct tape provides best results (same as for any other fixes). Driving on a 2 lane street thinking you are smart taking the right lane because traffic is backing up on the left one is actually not very smart. I learned this way that ‘on the street parking’ is really on the street, not even one wheel on the curb. And another time I learned that the dotted line dividing the two lanes can all of a sudden turn into a solid line accompanied by a sign ‘right lane MUST turn right’ (of course I had to go straight just like all the other losers I passed thinking I was smart). I actually got the digest of the motor vehicle laws, since I thought it might be good to know some things instead of deducing them, so far I have however failed to read it, I only flipped through the pages looking for funny things like: “No person shall hang onto or ride on the outside of any moving motor vehicle”. Or the advice on what to do when you are tired: 1 is play the radio, 2 is engage in light conversation, 3 is stop to stretch your legs and have coffee or a cold drink and only the 4th and last bit of advice is pull of the road and rest when you are too tired. And then in my final week I have read everything about parking, with special focus on the rules on the direction of parking.

When you go to the ER with an ear infection, they ask you when your last menstrual period was, this may appear to be a little bit off topic, but I heard later that that way they assure that you could not be pregnant. Twelve years ago, when I went to the doctor in the US (come to think of it, it was for the same problem. They call it swimmers ear for a reason, and I just happen to like to swim), anyway twelve years ago they asked if I always wear my seatbelt in the car. That one also seemed strange at the time but we heard later that that had to do with insurance: if you do not wear your seatbelt, you are uninsured even for swimmers ear. I think policies changed because this question was not in this time.

When you get discharged from the hospital, they ask you whether you need a note for your employer. I must have looked really dumb after that question, so they explained that some people need to proof to there employer that they were in fact seeing a doctor. I am very glad to be able to say that I do not work at such a place.

It takes about 38 days to eat 32 ounces of mini-pretzels, the same amount of time it took me to have my first incident (accident is too big a word) with my rental car.

Sometimes all the employees of the hospitals get an e-mail for volunteers they are looking for certain studies, but I don’t think there will be much responders to this one “The Gamble Program is looking for healthy adults to participate in an experimental vaccine study”. In this case name-dropping would not be too bad and I would suggest mentioning Procter as well, instead of just Gamble.

Do you know what it looks like to see a Japanese eat a napoleon salmiak bal? At first they look just not very happy, then when they get to the part with the salmiak powder you have to pay close attention because you will only have to opportunity for a few seconds to see that it looks like one of those kids on youtube having their first taste of lemon, before they run away for a trash can.

Before coming here they send me a lot of documentation on the visa, but also on life in Cincinnati. I realize that this is just to be helpful, but do I really need somebody else to tell me to keep my socks dry (especially in the winter when it is cold outside), or to wear a hat in the winter because of all the capillaries in your head that are close to the skin surface, making you lose a lot of heat through your head? It also explained that even though American girls may be friendly to you, it does not always mean that you can have sex with them whenever you want (I’m sure they phrased it a bit different though).

I just realized again, that I really don’t like to fly.